The Fungus Among Us

"Fuck!"
I say to myself.
"Can I do this?"

I jump off the ledge of the familiar into the sticky sweat of a slimy world that is drip drip dripping with spores. I have gone into the translucent gills of a Destroying Angel to the place where colors become sounds, tastes twitter behind my eyeballs, and visions pop from faeries' mouths. I am in the Kingdom of Fungi. 400 million years old. 1.5 million species strong. 100,000 latin names. Amanita. Agaricus. Boletus. Cantharellula. They sing in musty wines and powerful drugs, and in the largest of known living creatures that spans thirty acres of the Upper Peninsula of Michigan and is fifteen hundred years old. These fungal creatures are saprophytic, living off dead and decaying matter; parasitic, killing living hosts; and symbiotic, digesting nutrients for other living organisms.
Rising as if out of nothing and disappearing again into nothing, they charm us with questions. They dare us to taste the exotic and risk intoxication. Aphrodisiacs. Hallucinogens. Epicurean delights. The Fruits of Gods. The Buddha's last meal was mushrooms and as he lay dying he said that in his lifetime he had eaten two exquisite meals. One, the first meal after he had attained Enlightenment, and the second, this last meal served to him by a humble farmer.
The rain pounds the forest canopy. I lie on my belly and feast on brilliant orange Chanterelles.